Q&A with Umma & Mama

Q: Was becoming a Mom harder or easier than you thought it would be?
Mama B: I guess the biggest shock was that these so-called babies, don't actually "sleep like a baby" or do they? Plus, I think that ol' saying is just not accurate :)


Umma: When our first child was born, Israel, we did not know what to expect especially with his heart condition. The time he was with our family was a constant weariness but he brought so much joy to our family. He strengthened our faith and taught us to love even more. Like it Charles Dickens quoted in his book, 'A Tale of Two Cities,' "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom,...it was the epoch of belief."


With our second son, Josiah, it was a piece of cake. Why? Because we got more sleep than we ever did in the NICU or PICU. You think you had it bad? Try having your newborn in the NICU.


Q: Did you want a girl or boy?
Mama B: I didn't mind either one,  The sonogram showed it was a girl, because the cord was between his legs. Ha! So, when I finally had a 4D sono and we saw that "wittle" penis I was BEYOND excited and surprised! I LOVE having a son. It is SO MUCH fun!!!


Umma: Everyone wanted our family to have a girl because boys are all around. Me? I just wanted a healthy baby. I was completely content with the children God gave us.


Q: How do you have intimate time with your husband if your baby sleeps in your bed with you?
Mama B: HA! Gosh lets set the record straight on this one, once and for all, because I get this question ALL THE TIME, so here is my answer, and I'll answer with a question: Why is bed the only place for sex? Hate to say it, but if the only place your doing it is in bed then you must have a pretty boring sex life ;p Enough said, I think? Eh?


Umma: All I have to say is that there ain't no love making in the bed when our baby is sleeping in it. Otherwise, don't you worry about my "kiss, kiss time" with my husband. ;)


Q: How long do you plan on nursing that child?!?
Mama B: My simple reply is "What's it to you?" ;p


Umma: Oh, please ask Josiah. ;) Truth be told, I would like to be completely done before he turns 2. 


Q: What is your response when people ask you, "why don't you use the Cry It Out method (CIO) since your baby doesn't sleep through the night?
Mama B: Sighs. In MY OWN OPINION, the CIO method is the worst thing you can do for a child. Now please hear me out on this topic. Young human babies are the most vulnerable of any other species. The only way they have to communicate with us is through crying. With that being noted, our society, Western culture, tells us to put our precious vulnerable babies in cribs, and allow them to be alone and cry continuously and have no one go help them. Parents are told to believe that this helps babies sleep through the night (STTN). Number one, it doesn't always work. Number two, it is extremely damaging to the child. Studies have shown that the baby "gives up hope" and falls asleep which allows the parents to think, "great it worked." Little do they realize this child has fallen into what is known as " infant depression" which can have lifelong lasting effects. Nelly and I will share with you other more gentler ways to help your baby STTN. And ways to cope with the lack of sleep. Be encouraged- there are much better ways, dear friends.


Umma: I have many reasons on why I won't do the CIO method when it comes to sleeping. I  am firmly against it, even if it "guarantees" my child to sleep through the night at a young age. I have done my own research about it, and I have come to the conclusion that it is not healthy for the child. As a mother, God gave us the instinct to nurture our children when they need us. Why are we allowing society to tell us that it is okay to "ignore" the "mama instinct" that God gave us? If you prefer to follow this method, that is purely your choice. Please don't try to persuade me otherwise, because I won't persuade you to follow my own parenting. "To each is their own."


Q: What made you choose to use cloth diapers?
Mama B: Well, I suppose Mother Earth, but I am finding myself more into "Elimination Communication." (I'll explain more about this in another blog for those of you who are not sure what this method is about.) For our next child, we will start this from the get-go with part time cloth. When Oliver was only three pounds, all we used was disposables for quite awhile, and at night. Shhhhhhh! Not supposed to tell anyone that! These days, we let him run naked around the house, when the other kids are not here. My eighteen month old poops and pee's on the potty :) Other times we just use cloth. I like them- no harsh chemicals on babies bum, don't have to run out and buy diapers, don't have to put pants on him. He looks so cute running in his little bums!


Umma: I don't use them! ;) I've heard that they are difficult to clean in "hard water". If they were easier, I would totally give it a shot! We prefer to use natural and organic diapers such as Seventh Generation and Earth's Best diapers.


Q: How do you feel about vaccines?
Mama B: Well....I am very indecisive about them. Oliver needed to get them in order for me to open the daycare. He is on the Dr. Sears plan and never ever gets more than one shot at a time. We also skipped a few I felt were unnecessary, but we can always get certain ones when he is a little older. I really don't like all the extra junk they put in them, and the fact that when I was a child there were only eleven vaccines and now there are thirty to thirty-five. Ridiculous I tell you. I don't just do something because a doctor will recommend it....Doctors are not God.


Umma: Absolutely, yes! I pray over each vaccine and pray that it only does what it is meant to do (protect the child) and nothing else. If the vaccine is not needed like the flu shot or whatever else, then I don't always have Josiah get them.


Q: Tell us the truth. What are some hardships with co-sleeping and how do you handle them?
Mama B: Waking up with a bloody lip which has happened more than once. Being headbutted while your dead asleep. Having the "Milkbucks" right there and a baby who wants to sip on his own cup of joe all night. However, the good far out weighs the bad! Little baby snores, baby giggly-filled dreams, sweet kisses before drifting off together. :)


Umma: I have my nights when Josiah will kick me in the face or try to lay on my stomach. I just ignore it or try to move him in a better position. We are working on getting him in his own little bed, though. Personally, I think it drives my husband nuts, but we work it out as family and try to discuss it in a better manner when the time is right.


Q: Do you plan on adding more children to your family?
Mama B: We do. We want a lot of children. Some out of my belly, some out of our heart :) We'll see what happens. It's a touchy subject for me.


Umma: YES!!! As long as God opens the door to adding to our little family, then yes! How many more? I would love to have at least one more, but two more wouldn't be so bad in my opinion. ;)


Q: Whats three things is a must for a new Mom?
Mama B: 1. Love. Always love. No question about it. 2. Boobs. 3. Last but not least, an awesome mom, who comes and helps out by cuddling baby or cleaning your house, cooking, etc. Yeah, my mom pretty much rocks! She will cuddle Oliver, since I am a huge believer into baby wearing and totally against those jail cell things. Whoops, they are called cribs aren't they? But she will hold Oliver for hours and hours. (Love you Mom!)


Umma: 1. Continual love. There will be days where you will want to pull your hair out or want to put your child up for adoption. However, 'love conquers all', right? ;) 2. Patience. Remember, they are just a baby and they're allowed to have their moments just like we do. 3. Jesus & Support :) You need Jesus for the days when you don't think you're going to survive. You also need Jesus to give Him such gratitude for your little monster, just as well. You also need support because becoming a new mom is a hard journey to endeavor alone. That doesn't mean finding people to hold and bond with your baby while you fulfill household duties. That means finding people who will understand and help around the house even though your snuggling with your little sweet pea on the couch.