Words from Umma Nelly:It's about 10 minutes pass the actual Christmas "date" and I am wide A W A K E. I'm just enjoying the Christmas tree and also my AMAZING Christmas present from my BEYOND AMAZING husband, my brand new spanking 40 in TV! LOVE IT.
I adore the new family traditions that my new little family creates from season to season. They always bring me smiles...lots of them. I love reminiscing about my childhood memories from Christmas time. I love incorporating what my parents did for my siblings and me for my own family, now. Matthew and I try our best to create good, solid memories for our son and pray that he'll one day smile about all the holiday traditions. Maybe he'll pass some onto his own little family...one day.
Last year, I was determined to cook a turkey for Christmas Eve dinner. Yeah, the one who catches kitchens on fire wanted to cook a turkey. I remember following everything my mom said over the phone and praying, "Oh God, please don't let anyone get sick." It went better than expected, and it made me feel a little more braver for this Christmas.
This time, I decided to STUFF the turkey! Oh yeah, baby!!! My sister-in-law loves to stuff her turkey with oranges, lemons, celery and onions with a homemade butter rub. I decided to follow her instructions and made her write out some "detailed" instructions.
I was ready to hit the grocery store. Praise the Lord for my in-laws who love watching Josiah! I was able to buckle down and do some serious grocery shopping. Okay, I only needed the oranges, lemons and celery...and some seasonings. I was very careful with my selections and when I got to the produce section, I grab some oranges and was happy that they seemed to be pretty big. Got a few things here and there and I was ready to go home to my poor, little sick boy who developed croup.
Christmas Eve, we went to the in-laws and let Josiah open his presents and opened our stockings. It was relaxing and just enjoyable. It was perfect. It was getting late and I wanted to go home and bake Jesus birthday cake and get the turkey ready so all I had to do was pop it in the oven in the morning.
That did NOT happen...
Instead, I realized we didn't have anymore eggs since I used them up to make a nice french toast breakfast for my family. So, no birthday cake for Jesus... (No worries, Jesus got a pumpkin pie instead, thanks to Linda!) Then, I started to read to the directions for the turkey... And it said in nice big letters, "DO NOT STUFF THE TURKEY THE NIGHT BEFORE." Awesome. My top-notch husband offered to at least cut up the veggies and fruits, while I wrapped the rest of the presents.
While I was wrapping the presents, Matthew came out and said, "Babe, you know you got grapefruit, right?" My reaction, "are you serious? NO!" I checked those suckers to make sure that I didn't get the grapefruit. Look how well that played out for me. Those "really big oranges" went from amazing to crap. I was not made to cook.
I'm sorry if you had to work on Christmas. I'm even more sorry if you work at a grocery store and you had to work on Christmas. It's because of people like me who does the dumbest things. Matthew was able to get the right oranges, just in time for the big turkey.
You would think one who made a turkey last year would remember this year. No, I still had to call my mom cause I couldn't remember if I had to rip off those weird looking parts or if I left that plastic clamp on it. Last year, I ripped off the weird looking part and found out that this year it is actually supposed to stay there and helps keep the stuffing in it. I even asked my mom, how do I know if the turkey is right side up because last year, I put it in there the wrong way. Awesome. I know.
The turkey came out just fine. It smelled great and looked pretty good.
While we were eating dinner, I realized that I totally forgot to make the stuffing to eat on the side. Awesome. Oh well, Linda cooked plenty of delicious sides! Later on, I went to the pantry to grab some forks for pie and I saw the two jars of gravy sitting there. Waiting. Yep, I forgot to "cook" the gravy as well! Even better. I was responsible for cooking the turkey, the stuffing and the gravy. Yep, little chef here only remembered the turkey. I would never make it on "Hell's Kitchen". Never.
Christmas was awesome. I even got to talk to Mama Brittany while trying to get dressed for church, which I never made it. Matthew and Josiah were already staying home since Josiah was getting over croup, and I was going to come home when I was no longer needed in Kid's Church. Josiah wasn't too big into opening his gifts. It took him like two hours to open just three presents, no exaggeration there. He still has a good size pile left. Last year, we celebrated Christmas for about a month. It took him forever to open his gifts! I thought he was going to rip open his presents and really get into it. Nope. He was more amused with the blocks that he already had. :)
I guess Josiah can celebrate Hanukkah.
Christmas was awesome and now it's over....
It's always exciting and full of "adventures". Sometimes, the mishaps are what make the memories so good. :)
Amen.
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Sunday, December 11, 2011
"Diary of a Lupie Pregnancy" Chapter 2
Words from Mama Brittany:
I was apprehensive even still to have switched doctors to unfamiliar territory. I now venture about an hour from my home down to the big city; but then I realized it is my city. I was born there and I know it. It's not scary, it's beautiful and worth it.
I arrived on time for my anticipated appointment. I was nervous and thank God my mother was able to come with me since Jacob couldn't take off work. Everything went smoothly, we got the valet parking and were about 25 minutes early to my appointment. As I was closing in on the clinic, the doors to the elevator popped open and out came a pregnant woman in a wheelchair. I knew right then they were bringing her down from high risk for tests. Our eyes met and I knew exactly how she was feeling. A swoosh of emotions over came me and I was taken back to my time in high risk.
I remember being wheeled around for tests, sometimes I was allowed to go into the main hospital, catch a glimpse of some people. Most days I was all alone, I remember one day I was starring out the window and watching a trash bag blowing around by the wind and I thought to myself maybe I'll see a squirrel today. Oh how I wanted to see a squirrel. That dang on trash bag blew outside my window all day. I saw no squirrel. I remember the night I got discharged, my mother hen nurse whom I loved was the one to wheel me to my car. She wheeled me to the lobby and we waited there for Jacob to check out. If looks could kill I would have been dead, there I sit in my wheelchair, alone with flowers in my lap. It was like time was frozen still and I was the only person in the room, everyone was staring at me. Everyone had sympathy, everyone thought my baby was dead. I wanted to shout and scream and tell them he was alive and healthy, but it didn't matter. I was going home without a baby, that's all they saw.
Inwardly, my heart was aching for this woman, she got wheeled back to the testing center, tears in her eyes and tissues in her hand. I prayed for her,and prayed for her baby. It's a sucky feeling being high risk. And it doesn't matter if your baby arrives healthy or not, its not a ball of fun and people will never understand. So many people said that I should just be thankful that Oliver is healthy. I am thankful, oh I'm thankful, but it still hurts, its still scary and we don't need to hear your well meaning comments. It's like Janel said in her post about Izzy Bear- it's best if you say nothing at all.
As I was sitting there I met 3 other mamas. Two of them were 8 months and one of them was 5. They were all talking about the sex of their babies and complaining because the two 8 month ones wanted boys and they were having girls, the other one wanted a girl because she has a son. They were super nice but all I could think was, "Oh please God let my baby be healthy, Oh please God let the heart be beating right, Oh please God let this appointment go perfectly."
I remember being a first time mom, and being so excited about the baby without a care in the world. When you have healthy children, uncomplicated pregnancies you have no idea. I like to think that most people cherish their children healthy or not, but all to often I see babies and children being taken for granted. I see pregnant woman drinking Mountain Dew and Dr. Pepper and they get healthy full term babies. I'm not saying this out of bitterness, but I want to be real. If I can't be real on my own blog then where can I be real?
I don't want people to feel sorry for me, I have enough pity parties on my own thank you very much. If I had one wish, it would be that people would be thankful for what they have, everyday. If you have a healthy pregnancy, cherish it. Cherish your children, even when its hard and you want to toss them out the window. Trust me I have my moments with Oliver, but then I think of the nicu and my 3 pounder and nothing else matters. He's here with me, he's alive and healthy and thriving. This little baby in my tummy is healthy and perfect.
The sonogram went wonderfully the first thing the lady said was gasp " Your baby is gorgeous I love your baby!" Everything was exactly perfect. I measured exactly what I am, and every little test was totally normal! And after the trucking we made to the big city, I realized this is my city, the city I was born in and the city where my baby will be born in. The level of care I'm receiving is outstanding and I'm filled with so much peace and have so much hope. I don't have another sonogram for four weeks!
I still have two more appointments to clear this week but I think everything will go great! Thanks for all the prayers and love, it means the world to us to have your support.
Be loved and be cherished, and go out and share it. <3
I was apprehensive even still to have switched doctors to unfamiliar territory. I now venture about an hour from my home down to the big city; but then I realized it is my city. I was born there and I know it. It's not scary, it's beautiful and worth it.
I arrived on time for my anticipated appointment. I was nervous and thank God my mother was able to come with me since Jacob couldn't take off work. Everything went smoothly, we got the valet parking and were about 25 minutes early to my appointment. As I was closing in on the clinic, the doors to the elevator popped open and out came a pregnant woman in a wheelchair. I knew right then they were bringing her down from high risk for tests. Our eyes met and I knew exactly how she was feeling. A swoosh of emotions over came me and I was taken back to my time in high risk.
I remember being wheeled around for tests, sometimes I was allowed to go into the main hospital, catch a glimpse of some people. Most days I was all alone, I remember one day I was starring out the window and watching a trash bag blowing around by the wind and I thought to myself maybe I'll see a squirrel today. Oh how I wanted to see a squirrel. That dang on trash bag blew outside my window all day. I saw no squirrel. I remember the night I got discharged, my mother hen nurse whom I loved was the one to wheel me to my car. She wheeled me to the lobby and we waited there for Jacob to check out. If looks could kill I would have been dead, there I sit in my wheelchair, alone with flowers in my lap. It was like time was frozen still and I was the only person in the room, everyone was staring at me. Everyone had sympathy, everyone thought my baby was dead. I wanted to shout and scream and tell them he was alive and healthy, but it didn't matter. I was going home without a baby, that's all they saw.
Inwardly, my heart was aching for this woman, she got wheeled back to the testing center, tears in her eyes and tissues in her hand. I prayed for her,and prayed for her baby. It's a sucky feeling being high risk. And it doesn't matter if your baby arrives healthy or not, its not a ball of fun and people will never understand. So many people said that I should just be thankful that Oliver is healthy. I am thankful, oh I'm thankful, but it still hurts, its still scary and we don't need to hear your well meaning comments. It's like Janel said in her post about Izzy Bear- it's best if you say nothing at all.
As I was sitting there I met 3 other mamas. Two of them were 8 months and one of them was 5. They were all talking about the sex of their babies and complaining because the two 8 month ones wanted boys and they were having girls, the other one wanted a girl because she has a son. They were super nice but all I could think was, "Oh please God let my baby be healthy, Oh please God let the heart be beating right, Oh please God let this appointment go perfectly."
I remember being a first time mom, and being so excited about the baby without a care in the world. When you have healthy children, uncomplicated pregnancies you have no idea. I like to think that most people cherish their children healthy or not, but all to often I see babies and children being taken for granted. I see pregnant woman drinking Mountain Dew and Dr. Pepper and they get healthy full term babies. I'm not saying this out of bitterness, but I want to be real. If I can't be real on my own blog then where can I be real?
I don't want people to feel sorry for me, I have enough pity parties on my own thank you very much. If I had one wish, it would be that people would be thankful for what they have, everyday. If you have a healthy pregnancy, cherish it. Cherish your children, even when its hard and you want to toss them out the window. Trust me I have my moments with Oliver, but then I think of the nicu and my 3 pounder and nothing else matters. He's here with me, he's alive and healthy and thriving. This little baby in my tummy is healthy and perfect.
The sonogram went wonderfully the first thing the lady said was gasp " Your baby is gorgeous I love your baby!" Everything was exactly perfect. I measured exactly what I am, and every little test was totally normal! And after the trucking we made to the big city, I realized this is my city, the city I was born in and the city where my baby will be born in. The level of care I'm receiving is outstanding and I'm filled with so much peace and have so much hope. I don't have another sonogram for four weeks!
I still have two more appointments to clear this week but I think everything will go great! Thanks for all the prayers and love, it means the world to us to have your support.
Be loved and be cherished, and go out and share it. <3
Sunday, December 4, 2011
Diary of a Lupie pregnancy chapter 1
Words from Mama Brittany:
The first high risk OB (HROB) that I went to was, well she was pretty dreadful. She made it sound like I would be lucky if I made it out of this pregnancy alive. She told my husband and I that " Lupus was the scariest disease on earth" and that "if" I made it to 36 weeks I would immediately get a c-section. When I asked about a VBAC she laughed and called me a tree hugger. She was upset that I was still nursing Oliver, and said I needed to wean immediately, but had nothing to back up that statement, she even said continued nursing does not cause miscarriages. When she heard I was taking a raw prenatal she just about fell out of her chair. Oliver was screaming the whole time we were in her presence, and He kept saying "Go bye bye mommy daddy we go bye bye" He obviously wasn't found of this lady, and neither was I. So I left the office balling my eyes out and was determined to find a new Dr stat.
I was on the phone with midwives, lactation consultants, high risk obstetricians,and Doula's. A friend of mine suggested a group of midwives who work with a HROB. When I called these midwives they said they would be willing to work with me if He thought I was stable enough. I met the new HROB who I had high hopes for, and guess what?!? He turned out to be wonderful just like I thought He would be! He was honest and caring and said he looks at individuals not people as a whole. He has worked with many lupus Mama's and He is confident that I can try for a VBAC( vaginal birth after Cesarean) and if needed he would perform a gentle c-section.
All my hard work paid off and I am so glad that I am an informed Mama. I am so glad that I didn't just believe what the first doctor told me. She scared the living crap out of me and treated me like a diseased person, no pun intended.
I wanted to share this story because I want people to know that we have choices, we always have choices. Doctors are not God. I would encourage you to search out, research, and be informed. In everything.
I could have bowed to the first doctors wishes and given up my dreams of a more natural birth, but I know better, I've done the research. Pregnancy isn't some disease to be feared as it's portrayed on television. You know with woman screaming and in the hospital, tons of medical interventions, the doctor saves the day kind of stuff. That's great and some woman are OK with that. But I'm not and it took me a long time to heal from my traumatic birth with Oliver. I have rights, my pregnancy is not a disease its a beautiful wonderful natural thing. I am so glad that I was informed and chose to search until I found a great doctor. There are great doctors in the world, they may be few and far between, but they are out there, I know because I found one! Woot Woot!
So that's where I'm at now. So far so good, the baby is measuring perfectly and I've been feeling Oh so pregnant :-)
The first high risk OB (HROB) that I went to was, well she was pretty dreadful. She made it sound like I would be lucky if I made it out of this pregnancy alive. She told my husband and I that " Lupus was the scariest disease on earth" and that "if" I made it to 36 weeks I would immediately get a c-section. When I asked about a VBAC she laughed and called me a tree hugger. She was upset that I was still nursing Oliver, and said I needed to wean immediately, but had nothing to back up that statement, she even said continued nursing does not cause miscarriages. When she heard I was taking a raw prenatal she just about fell out of her chair. Oliver was screaming the whole time we were in her presence, and He kept saying "Go bye bye mommy daddy we go bye bye" He obviously wasn't found of this lady, and neither was I. So I left the office balling my eyes out and was determined to find a new Dr stat.
I was on the phone with midwives, lactation consultants, high risk obstetricians,and Doula's. A friend of mine suggested a group of midwives who work with a HROB. When I called these midwives they said they would be willing to work with me if He thought I was stable enough. I met the new HROB who I had high hopes for, and guess what?!? He turned out to be wonderful just like I thought He would be! He was honest and caring and said he looks at individuals not people as a whole. He has worked with many lupus Mama's and He is confident that I can try for a VBAC( vaginal birth after Cesarean) and if needed he would perform a gentle c-section.
All my hard work paid off and I am so glad that I am an informed Mama. I am so glad that I didn't just believe what the first doctor told me. She scared the living crap out of me and treated me like a diseased person, no pun intended.
I wanted to share this story because I want people to know that we have choices, we always have choices. Doctors are not God. I would encourage you to search out, research, and be informed. In everything.
I could have bowed to the first doctors wishes and given up my dreams of a more natural birth, but I know better, I've done the research. Pregnancy isn't some disease to be feared as it's portrayed on television. You know with woman screaming and in the hospital, tons of medical interventions, the doctor saves the day kind of stuff. That's great and some woman are OK with that. But I'm not and it took me a long time to heal from my traumatic birth with Oliver. I have rights, my pregnancy is not a disease its a beautiful wonderful natural thing. I am so glad that I was informed and chose to search until I found a great doctor. There are great doctors in the world, they may be few and far between, but they are out there, I know because I found one! Woot Woot!
So that's where I'm at now. So far so good, the baby is measuring perfectly and I've been feeling Oh so pregnant :-)
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Thankful
Words from Mama Brittany:
I thought it fitting that I post my little Thankful shout out on Thanksgiving :-)
First off I want to thank Umma Nelly. She's been there for me through some serious stuff. This summer when I was sick she was the one I called on a daily basis so that I could whine and cry and scream and at times cuss loudly. She was the one who told me it was ok, and I could let it out. She was the one who kept me sane when I thought of running away, and she was also the one who thought it was ok for me to run away, to her house of course! I love you Nelly. Forever thank you for putting up with my b*tching and moaning :-)
Next I'd like to thank my family. I have a wonderful husband who is very very patient with me. He also isn't going to let me just lay down and die, he pushes me to live life to the fullest and be thankful for everyday. Next is my parents, for there help in our lives. When I got sick over the summer they were coming on a daily basis to help me, and then when I got pregnant they continued to help out even more. Big thank you!! I love you all!
Next my Lola peeps. You all are the only humans on earth who know how I really feel. Although others can sympathize they have no idea whats its really like to live with lupus. You all keep me Laughing and Lupie and real! I love you all and am so thankful to have met all of you! We are family <3
Next I'm thankful for all my like minded Mama friends. Without you I'd be constantly banging my head against a wall. Thank you all for parenting from your heart, being informed, and giving your babes the very best! It's amazing how were changing the world one breastfed, co sleeping, baby wearing, cloth/sposie diapering, healthy baby led weaning, boobie sucking, KID at a time :-D
I'm thankful that there are good doctors in the world who care about individuals and who are willing to work as a team with their patients, especially me because I don't take anything at plain face, I smile nod and go home and do my own research. I'm thankful for a great Rhemy, and now for my new OB and Midwives.
I'm thankful to God for all the learning opportunities He places before me on a daily basis. Everyday I'm growing and learning more, I'm thankful for the chance to enrich my life, follow my dreams, and chase after my passions.
I thought it fitting that I post my little Thankful shout out on Thanksgiving :-)
First off I want to thank Umma Nelly. She's been there for me through some serious stuff. This summer when I was sick she was the one I called on a daily basis so that I could whine and cry and scream and at times cuss loudly. She was the one who told me it was ok, and I could let it out. She was the one who kept me sane when I thought of running away, and she was also the one who thought it was ok for me to run away, to her house of course! I love you Nelly. Forever thank you for putting up with my b*tching and moaning :-)
Next I'd like to thank my family. I have a wonderful husband who is very very patient with me. He also isn't going to let me just lay down and die, he pushes me to live life to the fullest and be thankful for everyday. Next is my parents, for there help in our lives. When I got sick over the summer they were coming on a daily basis to help me, and then when I got pregnant they continued to help out even more. Big thank you!! I love you all!
Next my Lola peeps. You all are the only humans on earth who know how I really feel. Although others can sympathize they have no idea whats its really like to live with lupus. You all keep me Laughing and Lupie and real! I love you all and am so thankful to have met all of you! We are family <3
Next I'm thankful for all my like minded Mama friends. Without you I'd be constantly banging my head against a wall. Thank you all for parenting from your heart, being informed, and giving your babes the very best! It's amazing how were changing the world one breastfed, co sleeping, baby wearing, cloth/sposie diapering, healthy baby led weaning, boobie sucking, KID at a time :-D
I'm thankful that there are good doctors in the world who care about individuals and who are willing to work as a team with their patients, especially me because I don't take anything at plain face, I smile nod and go home and do my own research. I'm thankful for a great Rhemy, and now for my new OB and Midwives.
I'm thankful to God for all the learning opportunities He places before me on a daily basis. Everyday I'm growing and learning more, I'm thankful for the chance to enrich my life, follow my dreams, and chase after my passions.
Oh, How I Try.
Words from Umma Nelly:
Some people think I worry too much. Some people think I should allow this or that. I just know that overall, I want what is best for my son. I have always had a love for research. I love looking up different topics and just learning a little more about things that matter to me. When I had Josiah, I found myself consumed by parent books, peoples advice, parent websites, the Doctors TV show... Oh, how I try to do what is best...
Sometimes, I get really sick of people when they try to tell me to do something different. I don't know how many times I have muttered, "if Josiah was in a car accident, it would be better if Josiah had broken legs, than a snapped neck." Do you know how many people comment on how Josiah should be facing forward in the carseat? Did you NOT listen to the new recommendation and why they recommend it to the age of two now? It's just simply aggravating... Oh how I try to ignore their little comments...
Sometimes, I get really tired of hearing people tell me that I worry too much when it comes to what "beauty" products we use or the food we consume. Listen, I don't judge you for what you eat, so let me eat my organic food in peace. I love learning what's in our food, because I don't want to fill my body with nasty processed food. It's not good for you. Yes, I still have my days when I pass a McDonald's and I find myself shoving my face with their french fries. However, I still want to try to eat healthy, "pure" food because I FIRMLY BELIEVE we can cure many health issues with just some SIMPLE changes in our diet. Why would I want to support body products or even food that have been linked to cancer or even psychological disorders? I KNOW that I can not run away from all the toxins of this world! I GET IT! HOWEVER, I want to do my best to stay away from the products and food that I can avoid. The more I can avoid, the better. Let me watch my documentaries. There is no harm in learning and being AWARE of how our food and products are being handled. Ignorance is not blissful; it's dangerous. Oh, how I try to live an "organic" lifestyle...
We live our lives as the clock keeps ticking, finding out who we are and our purpose in life. We run after the calling that God has constantly stirring up in our hearts. We beat to our drum, but together--we sound like a beautiful, yet broken orchestra. Our differences bring up fights and wars, but it also unravels beauty and how we can fit together. We were not born to be the same, but we were each born for a different purpose, a different calling. We were born to fight for what we believe.
If we didn't look out of place, I bet billions of people would walk around with signs with what they believe to be true. However, we use little remarks instead and always find a way to slip in what we think is right. I get tired of the remarks, especially when I'm not in the mood to debate. There's a time and a place for disagreements and whatnot. There are some things that I just don't want to hear anymore. It just gets old. I wish there were more people who would just support and let us find out whether we're right or wrong on our own terms, even if it will hurt. Some things don't even really matter, so why do we constantly find ourselves adding those little comments? Maybe it's just the fighter inside of us. Maybe it's just our human nature. It's hard enough to be a parent, why must others try to persuade you to not necessarily follow your motherly instinct? It's hard enough to figure out a steady nutrition "diet", why must others try to persuade you to eat this or that just because "they're fine"?
I know I'm a fighter. I know I stand on my soap box, a lot. It's because I feel like people are constantly trying to deter me from my beliefs. I try to be the best wife. I try to be the best parent. I try to be the best of what God intended me to be. I know I'm not always right. I know I can be stubborn. But... Oh, how I try to SO HARD to do what is right...
Some people think I worry too much. Some people think I should allow this or that. I just know that overall, I want what is best for my son. I have always had a love for research. I love looking up different topics and just learning a little more about things that matter to me. When I had Josiah, I found myself consumed by parent books, peoples advice, parent websites, the Doctors TV show... Oh, how I try to do what is best...
Sometimes, I get really sick of people when they try to tell me to do something different. I don't know how many times I have muttered, "if Josiah was in a car accident, it would be better if Josiah had broken legs, than a snapped neck." Do you know how many people comment on how Josiah should be facing forward in the carseat? Did you NOT listen to the new recommendation and why they recommend it to the age of two now? It's just simply aggravating... Oh how I try to ignore their little comments...
Sometimes, I get really tired of hearing people tell me that I worry too much when it comes to what "beauty" products we use or the food we consume. Listen, I don't judge you for what you eat, so let me eat my organic food in peace. I love learning what's in our food, because I don't want to fill my body with nasty processed food. It's not good for you. Yes, I still have my days when I pass a McDonald's and I find myself shoving my face with their french fries. However, I still want to try to eat healthy, "pure" food because I FIRMLY BELIEVE we can cure many health issues with just some SIMPLE changes in our diet. Why would I want to support body products or even food that have been linked to cancer or even psychological disorders? I KNOW that I can not run away from all the toxins of this world! I GET IT! HOWEVER, I want to do my best to stay away from the products and food that I can avoid. The more I can avoid, the better. Let me watch my documentaries. There is no harm in learning and being AWARE of how our food and products are being handled. Ignorance is not blissful; it's dangerous. Oh, how I try to live an "organic" lifestyle...
We live our lives as the clock keeps ticking, finding out who we are and our purpose in life. We run after the calling that God has constantly stirring up in our hearts. We beat to our drum, but together--we sound like a beautiful, yet broken orchestra. Our differences bring up fights and wars, but it also unravels beauty and how we can fit together. We were not born to be the same, but we were each born for a different purpose, a different calling. We were born to fight for what we believe.
If we didn't look out of place, I bet billions of people would walk around with signs with what they believe to be true. However, we use little remarks instead and always find a way to slip in what we think is right. I get tired of the remarks, especially when I'm not in the mood to debate. There's a time and a place for disagreements and whatnot. There are some things that I just don't want to hear anymore. It just gets old. I wish there were more people who would just support and let us find out whether we're right or wrong on our own terms, even if it will hurt. Some things don't even really matter, so why do we constantly find ourselves adding those little comments? Maybe it's just the fighter inside of us. Maybe it's just our human nature. It's hard enough to be a parent, why must others try to persuade you to not necessarily follow your motherly instinct? It's hard enough to figure out a steady nutrition "diet", why must others try to persuade you to eat this or that just because "they're fine"?
I know I'm a fighter. I know I stand on my soap box, a lot. It's because I feel like people are constantly trying to deter me from my beliefs. I try to be the best wife. I try to be the best parent. I try to be the best of what God intended me to be. I know I'm not always right. I know I can be stubborn. But... Oh, how I try to SO HARD to do what is right...
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