To the mom who had a c-section

I work with mamas and babies. I'm a big advocate of natural childbirth, obviously. But sometimes things happen beyond our control and our dreams of having a natural birth don't work out. For some of us a c-section is our biggest fear , and when it happens we are left feeling broken and torn apart. Worthless and a failure. Not good enough, not worthy of this baby. 

Sound familiar? Too much I've sat with friends and moms and had them talk about their c-sections using words like 'failure, broken, not worthy.' And for far too long these moms feel like they are not good enough, that they somehow failed their child/children. And you know what? I'm sick of it. 

I'm sick of society telling you that you are broken, that you failed. 

Please hear me c-section mama. If you hear nothing else on this blog that I ever write hear these words. 

You are strong. You are beautiful. Your body is so amazing that it formed another human life. It protected that life and allowed it to grow. It nourished that life. It was home, and heaven, and your baby's safe space. It was your heart beating as your baby grew and developed. It is sacred and wonderful. Every stretch mark is magnificent, every pound gained or lost. Beautiful. And your scar? The scar that might remind you of how your baby was born. It's your battle wound strong woman. Wear it proudly. It was your baby's safe door to this world, where they came through to find you waiting at the other side. 

C-section mama I'm proud to know you. I'm proud to be a part of this club with you. I stand beside you knowing how it feels. It's raw and it's real. Don't let anybody tell you how to feel, and take all the time you need to grieve and work through it, know that you are not alone. You are a treasure and a wonder. 

Be gentle with yourself. It's ok to feel however you feel. 

Seek out support (ican.com) and know you are not alone, your feelings are valid, and there's millions of mamas out there just like you. We are proud of you warrior mama. You are beautiful. You are brave. You are strong. You are a wonderful mother.  A wonderful wonderful mother.